You see it in the movies or read about it in books, but I had never actually come across a speed dating event. At one point, I even searched for an event because I thought that it would be interesting and that it increased my odds. It just didn’t seem like there were any around me or that people did that anymore. Then I met a guy on Bumble (see Misadventures in Dating Apps: Bait and Switch) who told me about one. I hesitated, but ultimately signed up because I was interested to see how it played out.
Getting to Speed Dating
I knew that the event was in a hotel, but I wasn’t really sure where as I had never been inside. I showed up and started looking around (assuming that there would be a sign or something). There wasn’t anything there, but I did notice two women who seemed to be looking for something as well. They came up to me and asked if I was part of the speed dating thing. We quickly introduced ourselves and continued the search for the event. We found someone who worked at the hotel and they told us we were at the right spot. So it seemed that the event coordinators weren’t there yet.
We ended up finding a place to sit and started talking. It was kind of nice to meet new people (even though I really struggle with that). It was also funny because we could tell as we were watching the people around us who were here for the event and seeing them interact with each other. Finally the speed dating host showed up and we went to go sign in.
Speed Dating Rules
I don’t know if you have ever done speed dating (and I also don’t know if these are the rules for most events). But the event that I went to had a few rules.
- We had to purchase 2 things from the bar
- Each round would last 4 minutes
- We were not supposed to ask for/give out contact information
- It was recommended that we circle yes or no on a sheet of paper to remember the guys
- Then within 24 hours, we were supposed to go online and submit the guys that we were interested in
- After that, we would get an email with the contact information of the people we matched with
The Speed Dating Event
To begin the event, the host had all of the women go sit down at different tables, then the guys came and sat down. It was awkward since the guys moved to sit with the ladies they were most interested in meeting. There also wasn’t enough men to go around, so there were a number of rounds where I just sat there.
Anyway, the first guy came up to me and rather than sitting across, he sat next to me, which just felt weird. We started talking, or more accurately, I asked him questions to which he answered. It was extremely uncomfortable and I was grasping at things to ask since the guy didn’t seem to want to help further the conversation. Finally, the four minutes were up and he moved on while I was circling a definite no.
The next guy came and sat down. We started talking and this conversation was a little easier however it was still awkward. It was kind of funny though as I made a comment about something and he immediately started circling on his paper. I’m not sure if it was a yes or a no as I didn’t circle yes for him.
After that, I had a couple rounds where I just sat there and waited for another guy to come to my table. Which wasn’t bad as the next guy was really great. He was very charismatic and we had a really good conversation. He also happened to be attractive so I was excited about him. I circled yes and then it was time to go on our break.
Once again the girls started talking. It hit me again, how much more fun I was having with them than with the guys. It also became illuminating. One of the girls came up to tell us about one of the guys. Which of course was the one I had just met. She told us he was a womanizer and we shouldn’t be fooled by him. He sort of came across that way, so I ended up changing my answer to no.
We got back to it and the guys after the break were more of a blur. The conversations were better but it still wasn’t amazing. Most of the guys seemed really young and there just wasn’t a spark. There were a couple guys though which were interesting enough that I decided to circle yes and see if anything happened.
After the event was over, there were a couple of us that stayed after talking. We ended up starting a group text message, which may or may not have been a good idea. It did definitely make things interesting, though. Then I drove home and input my answers onto the site. All I needed to do then was wait to see if I would match with anyone.
Have you ever gone to a speed dating event? What happened?